The Ceiling Fan in the Kitchen

The ceiling fan in the kitchen is bugging me. Whenever it’s at its top setting, it… I suppose the best word for it is “resonates”. It goes so fast that it rocks in its housing and makes a sound like crick! crick! crick! crick! crick! to which my only possible response is “that can’t be healthy.”

So, I check out the fan, and I notice that it has three switches accessed by pulling chains: one for the lamp, one to reverse the direction of the fan (I dare not try that at top speed. I have visions of things flying off in all directions) and one which controls the speed. From “off” one pull puts it to “fast”, then another pull to “medium” and a final pull to “slow”. You want to speed up the fan? Pull on this chain three times. Want to slow it down? Pull on it once.

So, I pull on it, once, and the fan slows from fast to medium. The crick! crick! stops, and I’m happy.

Until tomorrow. When it’s at top speed again.

Now, note that I don’t feel this ceiling fan moving air the way I feel the window fans blowing in air. I tend to consider ceiling fans to be a low-level constantly-working type of deal. I see no reason to operate the fan at top speed. I can’t see why anyone would. So, who the heck is turning up the ceiling fan to top speed every day? Erin? Gus? The poltergeist who turned our furniture upside-down?

(James peers suspiciously at Gus)

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