Hat tip to the Squib, for pointing me in the direction of this funny bit of Google satire.
Hmm… Google search your brain. How long till it comes to be, I wonder? How long…
Latest Web Commission Now Active
I’m pleased to announce the unveiling of Angelina Fast-Vlaar’s official website. Ms. Fast-Vlaar is the author of two books, The Valley of Cancer and the soon-to-be-released Seven Angels for Seven Days, both available at finer Christian bookstores everywhere, or at certain Chapters, or by going to your local bookstore and asking them to order it. This client was quite patient with me as I tweaked the site, offering suggestions but not overpowering me. I’m very pleased with how things have turned out, and I hope you will check out the site and consider ordering one of her books.
This web commission has come thanks to a referral from Susan Fish of www.susanfish.com. Susan has been very good about sending interest my way, so I think it’s the least I can do to thank her publically and encourage you all to visit her website as well.
On “False” Labour
No need to be alarmed, but Erin started to have a few non-progressing labour contractions at around 1 p.m. yesterday. They’ve been highly irregular, ranging throughout the afternoon from an hour to around twenty minutes apart. They went away around 6 p.m., and she had only one contraction last night and one this morning.
For the record, you do not call the midwife when the contractions are four hours apart or so. :-)
We know that these are non-progressing labour contractions and not Braxton-Hicks contractions as this new brand of contractions will hereafter be referred to as the “HolyF—-TheseHURT!! Contractions.
And for the men in the audience who haven’t yet seen their wives go through this, and are wondering what it’s like to experience a contraction, Erin put a very good image in my head, and it doesn’t involve grabbing my lower lip and pulling it over my forehead (hat tip to Carol Burnett).
You have to understand that, throughout the Summer of 2004, Erin hit a 10 on the Randall Chronic Pain Scale repeatedly thanks to her fight with trigeminal neuralgia. She knows pain. And she knows that these contractions aren’t as painful. They aren’t nearly as painful.
They do, however, resemble charley horses. You know what I mean: that sudden muscular twinge in the middle of the night that seeks to break your fibia and which sends you straight out of dreamland and screaming around the room while hopping on one foot? Imagine having one of those every five minutes or so for a few hours straight. Yeesh.
Men: we do have it easy during labour.