Hell Candy


Spotted at the Crossroads Restaurant and Merchantile Exchange near Elmira, Ontario earlier this month.

Years ago, when Erin and I were moving into our first apartment, Erin pulled out a package of liquorice and offered me one. What she didn’t tell me that this was Dutch Liquorice. Unsweetened. And salty. She parlayed my reaction (which included the phrase, “Ew! It’s stuck to my teeth!”) into a story she wrote later on, so I guess that’s okay. I actually quite like black liquorice, but I can’t fathom why people would eat it without a healthy dose of sugar. But, that’s the Dutch for you, I suppose. Centuries of holding back the Atlantic Ocean must do something to their attitudes about pleasure.

Fast forward to today, where I spot this. It’s liquorice. It’s Dutch (apparently). It’s stuffed with hot peppers. And it’s designed to stick to your teeth.

They eat these recreationally, folks.

And that’s how I know for sure that the Netherlands will never sink beneath the waves.

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