The Year Everything Changed, Again

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2025 will be the twentieth anniversary of my sister-in-law Wendy's death. To say that it came as a shock would be an understatement. On December 31, I summarized the year as "The Year Everything Changed," and I stand by that. Nothing was ever the same. Grief is not something you get over. Grief is something you grow around.

I should have said so again at the end of 2016 (or, more accurately, the very beginning of 2017) when my mother passed away, but I wasn't in the mood for blogging at the time.

The sad truth, however, is that everything can change again. It can change for a third time. There are some things you simply can't prepare for until they happen.

In 2024, we lost my father-in-law Wendell -- not unexpectedly, but still. We also had serious health issues with my father, which placed him in an assisted care facility, and my step-father-in-law, Michael, who is now currently recovering from a stroke. We've had to clear out and sell two residences, one of which was lived in for over thirty years. And while that's over and done with (for now), it's still a body blow that aches. The fact that this is unavoidable due to the march of time is little comfort. The political situation certainly hasn't helped.

This isn't to say that this year has been wholly bad. There are plenty of glimmers if we look. My father is safe and comfortable, as is Michael, and things could have been much, much worse. We are making changes to our lives and home that will stay with us for years to come in a good way. There is also Erin's Newberry Honour for Simon Sort of Says, the publication of her first book of poetry in years, my publication of The Sun Runners, and my work with my fellow authors to put together Tales from the Silence. Both our kids are safe and relatively happy. Eldest child has graduated high school and is looking forward to post-secondary work in graphic design. Youngest child is happily creative, building truly impressive worlds and characters at great speed that frankly puts me to shame. Financially, we have reached some stability and hope to stay there for a while (fingers crossed).

But the world has changed, outdoors and in. The old foundations we hadn't realized we were relying on have cracked or crumbled. Things are going to be different, and some things are still going to happen that just aren't going to be nice. But we have love. We have each other. We have creativity. So, we will soldier on for better days ahead.

Because I know in my heart that they will come, because of what we still have, and how we will help each other into the future.

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